Adrenaline Junkie

I have been trying for the past 30 hours to get through a stack of drafts and give feedback. Normally this would take me about 4 hours total, but right now it is going a lot more slowly. Not relying on a jolt of adrenaline does mean that I can work at any time, but the work goes more slowly. I have to relearn how to be productive and disciplined with no rush of panic and no coffee to spur me along.

One upside of getting my stress under control showed up this morning as I was driving Chris to school. A huge pickup (quad cab, dual axles, etc) drove across Mahan Dr. and just stopped there, waiting for a chance to turn left, and I was headed right toward it. Now my former self would have cursed, honked, avoided the accident, gotten shaky, gotten a splitting headache, and then been completely exhausted and useless for the rest of the morning. Today, though, I just avoided the accident and went on my way. I was thinking, "Why do I feel strange right now?" and it was because I wasn't in that adrenaline-induced fight-or-flight state. I was just calmly driving on my way. It was weird, for real.

So back to my workload... How do I get things done without the rabid dog of panic biting at my heels?